What if...my church, my house..I vote no on a bailout

I made a decision about something very dear to my heart. It was a necessary thing for me, but painful because it would mean owning up to my own issues I had to face.

For a long time, I made excuses for myself as a minister and for others and for the church. After a while when serious issues came up, I found myself saying, "I don't want to know....don't even tell me." And why? Well, bottom line is - then I would have to actually look at it, make a judgement - which I did not want to do. I just did not want to deal with it. So I kept "bailing out" situations, people's poor character - probably all in the name of "walking in love" - yikes - that is a slippery road.

I am continually writing this note and erasing it and re-writing it, thinking perhaps I can improve on the way I write it. I don't know how to say it any other way. Remember, this is my journey and I have to judge myself with each sentence I write.

So I vote "no" for bailing out my church, my house.

From here on out, you are on your own. If someone comes to me with their hurts because of the horrible abuse they have experienced or the lousy way they have been treated by leadership - the shunning - no excuses for you, leadership - you are on your own.

My friends, if you work or volunteer in a situation where you have no voice, opinions are not welcome - or you are afraid to share honestly because of fear of how you will be treated - think seriously about why you feel that way.

If you work or volunteer somewhere where it is your job to "make leadership look good" ask yourself why is that? Can't they look good on their own? Do they need that much help? I have never understood this philosophy.

If you are volunteering at a church for hours and hours and this is beginning to wear on your marriage and family - stop doing it. Go home and love your family. Don't sacrifice your marriage and family for someone else's vision. Ministry is not before family. Never has been.

If you belong to a church where you never see the senior pastor visting the sick, feeding the poor, helping those who are hurting or is not accessible to the people in the church - you may want to ask yourself if he is a pastor. Thank God he has a great staff who "make him look good."

Young people - could you take it upon yourselves to re-define "Youth Group?" If I were to ever pastor again with my husband, the youth would probably not be in the 4 walls of the church playing the best video games, prophesying to one another and having repentence meetings every week.... we'd be out in the community helping build houses, feeding the poor, helping teach people to read, being big brothers and sisters to kids who don't have a dad or mom in their life. I guarantee as young people, you will sense more purpose and direction for your life. You have so much to share, such creativity to use for the kingdom - you really could turn the world upside down or right side up.

Now, just so you don't think I have completely gone daft - I still love the church - always have. I still love ministers and ministry - and there are still good churches and good pastors. And I have not even taken time to share how awful ministers are treated by people.

My voice is really for the younger ministers, younger Christians,and younger people who will consider ministry. It is for you I write this. Certain patterns and standards that exist now are not correct and you need to understand that it will be you who will need to pioneer a fresh road, reform some areas.....and still bring honor to the King.